To My Daughter, Who Made Us Believe in Change
Beauty l Catalyst in TDC Kathmandu
Beauty is a catalyst who spent five years with LP4Y in India and Nepal. Her father wrote to her to describe the shift in attitudes that has taken place within her family and among her loved ones.
Dear daughter Beauty,
Today, when I look back 28 years ago, I never imagined I would be the person I am today. 28 years ago, an elder daughter was born, whose fortune was written by herself. Because thankfully, if it had been written typically, the way it has been written in our family and bloodline, it would have been different.
Well, it was the same way I was brought up, but the trust “You can do it” would have been missing. When you were growing up, the questions you asked were irritating, but deep down, I knew you had some driving force which led you to ask questions and not follow traditionally what your other cousins were following.
You challenged me, and somewhere I was happy to be challenged
“NO MEANS NO” — it’s not only a sentence you taught me, your mom, or your siblings, but you told me how respecting women is basic and important, and not just about following the patriarchal norms and customs that were mostly made by men, for men. You fought for basic rights, especially for your own education, freedom, and the respect every human being deserves in the community.
You challenged me, and somewhere I was happy to be challenged by your thought process without disrespecting me. I r
emember after your bachelor's, you almost gave up on your job because you were tired, and I am happy that at that moment I didn’t give up. For the first time, I believed in your dreams, your intuitions, and your confidence.
This belief brought you to Life Project 4 Youth, from India to Nepal, to France, to the Philippines, and now back to India, to your own home state. You have broken the stereotypes we see in our community, as a win for a daughter and a proud moment as a father. You not only influenced the conventional thinking in our family, but you have changed the way we see every human being, and especially the women in our community.
“What did Beauty study? I will let my daughter study the same, and I want her to be a social changemaker for other women and continue her studies rather than marrying her.”
You remember how the men, fathers and brothers used to eat first and were served by your mom and you. Decisions were made by the superiors. Then, now, we eat together and make decisions together. From having no picture together due to awkwardness to having the first picture has led us together on our journey. This has touched me so much. When you were in Nepal, your uncle came to me and asked, “What did Beauty study? I will let my daughter study the same, and I want her to be a social changemaker for other women and continue her studies rather than marrying her.” You changed the concept of early marriage in our family. You were the first child in the whole family to have higher education, to go out of your hometown, to do a job across Indian states and now countries, despite the financial and misogynistic challenges you faced.
I know LP4Y has brought a lot of impact to vulnerable people out there in many countries, but the impact you brought at the cost of living away from us is powerful and emotional to us.
Thank you for leading on the side of the world which no one speaks or shares about with people. I am happy to see you happy and growing, and look, today you are 28 and happy, bringing smiles to us and the girls of your own community. You brought purpose to your life and not just wanted to earn, but chose to learn and give back.
Yours faithfully,Your Dad
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